Kidd's Kids

Back in early August, Chase was listening to 106.1 when he heard a random announcment about Kidd's Kids wanting more families to sign up for their Disney World trip this year. I had never even heard of this before. Anyway Kidd Kraddick in the morning founded this really cool organization where they send disabled or chronicly ill children with their families to Disney from donatitons they receive. All excited Chase asked if we could apply. He heard them say that diabetics could go. I'm thinking, diabetic? Like that's the worse of his problems. I've never signed up for anything like this, never even thought of it. Why would I? Things like that don't happen for people like us, do they? An all expense paid trip to Disney World for the entire family? Get real. That happens for those kinds of people in like, well, Hallmark Lifetime movies or something. But it never hurts to try and it sounded like we qualified. Certainly we've had the most devastating finincial three years ever. We haven't been able to take the kids on any sort of vacation for I don't even know how long. If we couldn't drive there, we didn't go. And Chase definitely has a chronic illness. Unbelieveably, we got a letter that said we get to go. It's still a little hard to believe. And I'm afraid to get too excited - for when you live with an ill child, you never know what is going to happen day by day. And sure enough, during all this excitment, Chase ruptured his spleen and now we are doing all the preparatory work to get him evaluated for a new liver. I've asked all the doctors and so far the consenus is that we should go and have a great time. We could all use a little stress free time. Stress free? More than that. It's gonna be awesome! All right, I'm gonna quit suppressing my excitement. It's gonna be great!
Thank you Kidd Kraddick, Derrick, and all the crew. You're the best!

State Fair of Texas

My only older sister, Bekie, came out for a weekend visit. It was great. She is wonderful fun to hang out with. We were able to take the kids out to the State Fair of Texas. It was a beautiful cool and cloudy day -- just perfect for roaming. And roaming my little ones did -- all over the place and in many different directions. Keeping them all safely un-lost took most of the time so we barely were able to traverse a third of the fair grounds, but that's the fun with kids. It was just nice to be out doing something in the cool Texas air.




See Tate straggling in the rear. That's the closest we kept together the entire time.




Big Tex!
Kids loved watching his mouth move.

No time to blog

I've been to so many appointments lately I haven't had much time for blogging. I asked my boss yesterday to lower my hours. I'll be going from 4 days a week to only two. My paycheck will be almost nothing, but I just can't do it anymore. Tuesday when my five year old broke his arm was the last straw.

Neither dear heart or myself was home. Dear heart got there first and took T to the emergency. For some reason I'm still trying to figure out, they sent him home with it wrapped and said to come back in the morning. In the am, I took him back to the ortho clinic and they were also surprised that the arm hadn't been set right away.

Anyway, T has seen Chase get too many IVs so he was prepared on how he was supposed to act. . . kicking and screaming and fighting all the way, which he did with gutso and after two attempts, the nurses gave up. I kept asking them over and over, if they were going to put him out anyway, why not give him the happy juice and put the IV in while he was asleep. Please, this was not my first trip to the OR and I know my kids. Stubborn and tough as hell and with too many experiences in hospitals. It also didn't help to have 7 adults standing around in a very small room as my little guy goes balastic. One nurse even had the nerve to tell me that T needed counseling. Hello! What does she know about it? What he needs is a mother that isn't always gone, either working or at medical appointments or financial appointments and a family who is not in severe stress. Plus not having 7 strange adults watching him and holding him down to pierce needles in his arm. That's what he needs. Even if I thought he needed counseling (he's 5 people) that would just be more appointments that would further the problem.

I didn't tell her this all at the time because by then I was in tears, not over the procedure, which I'm sure they assumed. Scared mom, yadda yadda, but it was when they told me that they would do it with the juice, but couldn't schedule it until that evening or possibly the next morning, that I got emotional, I couldn't help it. I simply could not manipulate my exhausted mind around the fact that I still had to go to work in a few hours, and finish the profile for SSI medicaid, and get Chase's pulmonolgy visit completed. My mind went in a meltdown right there in front of everybody. No wonder they thought we all needed therapy.

Fortuneately the surgeon took charge, came in and told me that he rescheduled things and was going to do it right away and asked me if I could get T to drink the juice so they wouldn't have to hold him down and attempt an IV again. Then he kindly kicked all those numbskull nurses out of the room so I could calm T down. Guess what, T drank the stuff even though he didn't like it and very shortly got happy and silly and all was well. Why couldn't they have just done that in the first place?

I'll tell you, I've been going to Cook Children's Medical Center for 17 years almost every 3 months if not more. My oldest child died in my arms in that hospital and I think about that everytime I'm there, brace myself every time Chase is admitted and pray that I don't get put in that same room . . . so far we never have, but I've passed it, looked in, remembered . . . but regardless, I would tell anyone that Cooks is the greatest hospital ever and they have always managed things exceedingly well . . . except this one time. I don't know what happened, but from the start in emergency, it was mishandled badly, one thing after another, until the surgeon came on the scene then all fell into place how it should. I even got T home in time for me to go to work.

But then I worked two midnight shifts in a row and was dragging, and seeing that my children were suffering, T physcially, and my oldest boy, who I had hoped would step up to the plate, reacted the other way and has gotten beligerent and acting like he doesn't care. Or he is simply turning into a teenager. O crap, maybe we all do need counseling.

I do have some tremendously good news, but Chase's nebs just finished so I'm off to bed for now, so that will have to wait for later.

Deeper Magic


Since I know how to post pics now, I thought I may as well put up my one and only claim to fame in writing so far (unless I include the essay contest I won in fourth grade from the national guard) I still have that plague and trophy on my shelf right next to a copy of this anthology that one of my short stories is in. Jase's Challenge, beginninng at page 65 if anyone cares to purchase one of the 14 copies left on Amazon. Geez, maybe I better get some since the wonderful little ezine that first published it then put it in their first anthology is no more. Darn shame.

Anyway, I don't really write that many short stories, favoring novels, but this one came from the heart. It's in a fantasy setting (where else?) featuring a veteran of the wars who is bitter and seeking a meaning to what he had fought for. Along the way he meets two young brothers who are trying to find a mother for a hatchling dragon they had taken in.

For a copy of your very own go to: http://www.amazon.com/Deeper-Magic-Jonathon-Earl-Bowser/dp/1586490028/sr=8-5/qid=1158544396/ref=sr_1_5/102-0382741-4893751?ie=UTF8&s=books

But we just got out . . .

So we barely get Chase home, thinking all is well for now, we shouldn't have to go back into the hospital for a while, and we can try and get our lives back on even ground again . . . when I let one of his friends come over because they haven't seen each other for a while. What could happen? The boys just like to play runescape on the computer. Well, Chase was lying on the floor and friend on the couch above him, when the friend simply rolled off and his elbow landed innocently in the middle of Chase's spleen.

Chase told me his stomach hurt, which is pretty much a daily occurance anyway. It was the next day that he told me exactly what happened because he didn't want me to be angry with his friend.

So I take him back to the hospital. I didn't even pack an overnight bag because I was so counting on them telling me he just bruised his stomach and to go home. No way could we end up here again so soon. I'm too exhausted. Our family can't take much more of this. But no, of course things can't be simple. Said elbow ruptured a hole in Chase's poor distended spleen about the length of my finger. This cannot be happening.

Then the fun began. Add a new specilist to our list of doctors, a spleen surgoen, Dr. Bliss. And apparently what to do with spleens is highly debated within the medical community. Is it better to take it out or just leave it in? But of course, ultimately, (they all look at me) that will be your decision. How do you make a decision like that?

But I really didn't have to. They pretty much decided among themselves, my pulmonologist who I trust immensely, explained what he thought would be best for Chase and waited for my nod of agreement. In most cases where the spleen is damaged this bad, they would simply remove it, but since Chase isn't an ordinary kid, they had to factor in whether the spleen was causing more damage or helping more. Yes, his spleen is wreaking havoc and causing all sorts of problems in his body, but it is also producing white blood cells, which Chase is low on anyway and will need to have in order to undergo a liver transplant which is inevitable now. At that time they will probably take out his spleen, but for now they will leave it alone and let the rupture heal on its own.

As for Chase's friend -- I haven't told him or his mother any of this, nor do I intend to. It was an accident. Chase's spleen was fragile. If it didn't happen this way, it would have happened another. Regardless of it not being his fault, how would you feel knowing your child seriously hurt another child? I hope they never find out. That said, I realize it will just take one of my kids to blurt it out.